Jia Hui
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KR Stepper
♥s Gymnastics
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Mei.Mei-

Love, ja
6:03 PM

♥ Thursday, December 22, 2005

The First Official (N)anyang (A)lumni (G)ymnastics AKA NAG 'Chalet' was a butt torturing [the overnight cycling], self discovering [how weak we are] and pretty freaky [the long dark lampless path] experience. Anyhow I was happy to be in the company of four darlings wen, xxy and kim :)

Tonight I watched two fairy tales with the touch ruggers and had dinner during the movies too! At this very nice place but a little over priced place called cozy canopoy! We had one room all to ourselves and could pick movies to watch (: We watched a cinderalla story and ella enchanted. I loved both! The storylines are a little similar and are both pretty brainless movies but I really enjoyed watching them! So sweet.. so happy! Sigh.

Shall post photos up another day! Busy writing christmas cards last minute. And I'm short of cards! Have to get more tomorrow and I hope they still have the ones I want. Eeks so last minute!

Love, ja
4:37 PM

♥ Tuesday, December 20, 2005

I'm so never going to be on time when meeting chao again! He made me miss my 4.40pm movie! Still gotta thank pwee, kexin and chao for watching the movie with me though. We watched 'Perhaps Love'.. From what I heard from others, and just from the look of the movie, I was quite sure I'd like it. It's so.. my type of story/movie. But, I didn't really enjoy the movie. I was feeling quite bored throughout.. Even after I watched the movie I thought it's the movie I'd USUALLY love. Wonder why though. I was pretty disappointed, maybe not at the movie. Just at myself. Should I watch it again? Just to enjoy it? Perhaps not. Waste of money. hmm..

I ate so much today..

I can't wait to meet wen and xxy tmr :)

Love, ja
1:19 AM

♥ Sunday, December 18, 2005

My parents, sister, sasa and I went to send auntie off today. It's terribly sad to say goodbye. Especially to someone who's been living with us for years. Auntie worked for us for four years.. many years back. Then she returned to philippines for two years.. all along I didn't lose touch with her. We wrote letters and stuff, at the end of the two years she decided that she wanted to come back to singapore and my mum didn't mind hiring her too so she came back to work for us (: It's not exactly coincidental and really shocking, but I choose to think of it as fate. Okay that sounds really stupid. So she's been back for another, four or six years? Pretty long I would say. She's not just a maid working for us, she's been really nice. As my sister mentioned in her blog [surprise minghui!]we can go to her when we're upset. There have been many times we hugged each other crying, either her, me or both of us. There's also been instances when she pissed me off or vice versa. Not to mention she's been taking such good care of patchy all this while, while I've been being the irresponsible owner I've always been. The person Patchy listens to most is her, although the most frightened of is also her, I'll not be surprised if he loves her the most. My point is, damn, I miss auntie. She's in manilla already. Hope everything's been good. The past week or so, I've been avoiding being alone with her for more than three minutes. Last night, I didn't go for dinner with my family, sasa and auntie. I knew it was a farewell dinner and I should have been there. But I wasn't. On one hand it was because I didn't wanna pangseh xinyi and gang, on the other hand it's 'cause I didn't want her to start talking about her going home, and both of us ending up crying. I didn't wanna be sad.. I was being selfish, avoiding all the potentially awkward moments. But this morning she really had to leave, and I couldn't avoid it no more..

This was bad. So was that.. but that's worse. 'Cause its been on for so long.

I promised myself that last night would be the last time I was going to be bothered about that. I'll extend that to tonight I guess.

Around two years ago, one day, on the beam during training, I suddenly felt that if I just forced myself to be confident, act confident, I'd really be less wobbly on the beam. And I'd end up feeling more confident though I wasn't confident at first. I think it did help. Too bad, I still failed during the competition that year, and the year after. But that's not the point.

That led to a new theory of mine last night. If I try acting happy, and force myself not to think of this, and that, I'll eventually not be bothered about that anymore. Think it'll work? I hope so..

The type of 'sorrys' I hate most are those said by people who aren't even in the fault. Worse still, when it's my fault. But the people feel obliged to say them, maybe 'cause they think it'll make me feel better. They make me feel worse. Much worse. They make me feel like I've been so stupid all along..

I'm so tired!

That's enough. Time for me to put my theory into practice =D

Oh yes xinyi, I'm guessing you'll be the only one who might last through this entry. Thanks for talking to me tonight!

Love, ja
11:59 PM